17 Things I wish I Knew About Becoming a Mom

Becoming a mom is by far the most rewarding thing in the world. However, it can also be shocking and overwhelming if you have no idea what to expect. 

I was extremely surprised to find out how many things I actually didn't know and I wish someone would have told me. So, I am going to tell you the 17 things I wish I knew about becoming a mom.

You Will Learn as You Go

Becoming a mother for the first time, and honestly even the second time comes with new challenges every time. Every baby is different and they don't come with instruction books. It is so rewarding but it is a constant learning experience. There is no amount of preparing that will have you fully prepared for what you will experience when your baby comes. 

When I was pregnant the first time, I had never been around a baby in my life. I didn't know how to change a diaper let alone that bottles have different size nipples and flows. I spent my nights watching Youtube videos of other people's experiences to try to get an idea of what it would be like. 

However, when the time came, I still had no idea what I was doing. But, you will learn. You will figure it out and it will get easier. 

Your Sleep Will Never Be The Same

Even as they get older, the sleep issues may still be there. Each child is different. My newborn sleeps better at night than my three year old does. It really depends on the child. There is no way to prepare or be used to that until you experience it. But you will adjust and get used to it. And you will live. 

Your Body Will Never Be The Same

Starting with pregnancy, becoming a mom changes your body in ways that you never thought about before. You might have stretch marks and a little extra where you didn't before. Your ankles might be swollen and you probably can't see your feet. But those changes don't after pregnancy. 

From the moment you get pregnant to months postpartum, your body is changing. When I got pregnant, I was a tiny teenager. I was shocked that my body didn't just go back to normal after having a baby. There can even be permanent changes like hips widening after birth. But, I wish I knew to expect that it would change and not go back to the same as before. 

You Will Discover a New Love

The best advice I was given when I had my son from my own mother was that every age with her was her favorite. You might hear a lot of people telling you to soak in the newborn fase and that it goes by so fast. While this is true and you should try to enjoy it, you will enjoy the next stage just as much. And then you will enjoy them talking and walking. The next thing you know, they are 18 years old in the blink of an eye. 

Don't feel pressured about enjoying the newborn phase right away. Your hormones are crazy, you are going through so many changes, and your life is turned around in a matter of 24 hours. You are going to get through it, but don't feel bad if it isn't all sunshine and rainbows right away. 

Your Relationships Will Change

Becoming a mom comes with many changes and there are so many dynamics at play. Whether it is your partner, family or friends, your relationships will change. There is no telling which relationships will grow stronger and which will suffer. But they will change. And you will quickly find out who is there for you and who shouldn't be in the picture. 

You will notice who stops by to check on you. And you will notice who doesn't call anymore. This may or may not be a hard adjustment, but becoming a mother will make you prioritize who you have in your life because you don't have the time you used to have. You will also want to prioritize your relationships for the sake of your kids. 

Becoming a Mom Means Self Care is not Selfish

When becoming a mom, you will quickly learn the importance and worth when it comes to self care. A helpful tip is to set aside a time every day that is just for you. Whether it is a drive to get a coffee while your baby sleeps or taking a few minutes to get ready in the morning, you deserve it. 

It might not be as easy as it was before to find the time. But you need to set the time aside and do everything in your power to prioritize yourself.  You are the most important component in your children's life and they need you. In order to be a good mom, that means you need to be doing good yourself. 

How will you show your children happiness if you are miserable? How can you show your kids how to take care of themselves when they never see you do it? You are their example and they will take after you. Show them what can and should be done. You deserve it and they do too. 

You Will Learn to Ask for Help

If you are a people pleaser, this one is for you. When becoming a mom, this was one of the hardest challenges. Asking for help is not easy. At first, it can appear to be selfish or make you feel like you don't have your life together. Let me tell you. I have never in my life met a mom who did not have any help whatsoever or did not ask for help at some point. 

In this world, you can't survive alone. It is okay to ask for help. If it is being offered, take it. In my experience, the first time I had my baby, I wouldn't let anyone help. They would offer, and I would say no it's okay. But I really needed it. 

This lasted a few weeks until I was crying my eyes out and my mom took my baby for me and made me go to bed. Not everyone has helpful parents or a support system. So, find help when you can. And if it is being offered, just accept it. You will only have a newborn for 8 short weeks. You will have a lifetime to repay the help you were given in that time. 

Becoming a Mom Means Mom Guilt 

Mom guilt is real. You will experience it, but it's okay because everyone does. Becoming a mom takes a toll on you as a person. Your baby and children need you to survive. Sometimes you are going to feel guilty that you aren't spending enough time with them. 

My mom gave me this advice. She told me "If I would have spent as much time with you growing up as you wanted, I would have never gotten anything done. I wouldn't be able to pay the bills and I wouldn't have had a life." This is so true. 

Truthfully, I would have let her spend every single minute with me if it was my choice. Your baby probably feels the same. But just because that is what they want, doesn't mean that is what is best. That is why you are the mom. 

You Will Figure It Out 

Trial and error will be your new normal. But you are going to figure it out. There is no manual or instruction book for kids. But luckily, in this day and age, there is the internet. 

If you can't figure something out, you can Google it. You can look it up on TikTok or Instagram. There are thousands of mom Facebook groups. You can ask any questions. There are a million resources. 

Something you learn when you become a mom is that every stage will pass. Every hard thing you are experiencing will come and go. Phases will happen, but you will grow and learn. And become more confident as a mom in the process.